It's been said that the longer you do something eventually you will hurt yourself doing it, not a matter of if but when.  Not sure I like the sound of hurting myself at all, BUT there's nothing worse than hurting yourself doing something completely asinine or better yet an everyday action. Worse yet the painful tale you have to tell people when they ask you what happened...oh nothing I just coughed and my spine detached and shot out of my back…Good God I hope I never get that sick!!

 

 

Injury stories-Minus the Badass Backstory:

 

1. Old Manager at World's Gym came in with a halo neck brace.  I all but prepped myself for an amazing lifting story..maybe overhead pressing and the bar fell on his head, you know something dramatic with ambulance arrival and stories of heroism. Instead, the story was he was playing Frisbee golf and snap went his neck.  WTF!!!  Is that even possible??? Is there tackling involved in Frisbee golf? I think I would've just lied about that one.  At least throw in a guy on drugs went wild on the field…I dunno anything but, I threw a Frisbee and my neck snapped!

 

This guy looks like he's in pain, but at least he's lifting some beastly weight!!

 

 

2. I guess you might say that some things were just waiting to go snap, such is the case with my husbands back.  Never any signs of injury, no pain, NADA, then his back is completely out.  What Happened-deadlifting?? "I coughed in the shower and it snapped." Holy shit, I instantly thought I hope this crap isn't contagious I just saw your ass!

I guess he shouldn't feel so bad, his friend in High School, slipped a disc taking a dump.  He told me his mom had to wipe him and get him off the toilet, at 17 years old.  Sorry, Guy, blame Eddie for telling me the story and putting it out there for the world!  

 

 

This is the kind of cough that can make your back go SNAP…

 

 

3. Brian, Owner of Foothill Gym told me that he tore his bicep diving into the pool.  At least he was doing something active.  I hate swimming and think it's just horrible, mainly cause I don't know how to swim, however, I do a mean doggy paddle for about 5 seconds. Since he told me this I have even less desire to learn to ….I mean who wants to dive into 12 foot deep water and possibly drown AND have muscles detach?! I failed to ask him how he managed to swim back to the edge….Good thing I wasn't around he'd have to just drown-LOL I'll see him later tonight and get the full story!

 

4.  No Post is complete without my own tale of DUMBASSERY….so yes I tore ligaments in my right glute area- you know trying to be all flexible n shit.  Yes, I do believe stretching is good, but prbly not a good idea to put your leg where it doesn't want to go (especially the day after lower body work and sore as shit hamstrings)!  So, I was doing what all awesome people do in a squat rack besides arm curls….putting my leg up hella high on the hook.  I heard a tear that sounded eerily like celery snapping and quickly put my leg where it should've been in the first place…on the damn ground.  I quickly iced it, began taking multi-vitamins on the regular-because you know that just cures every ailment and injury you've cause to your body. I also have an amazing massage therapist that likes to torture me every week with her elbows. 

 

This is kinda what I was doing but my leg was even higher….BIG MISTAKE!!!

 

 

 

 

I guess we all can't have awesome injury stories…..I guess the important take away is if you're going to hurt yourself doing something dumb or by merely breathing make sure you have a good ass story to tell… or you're wearing something cute-or better yet you're naked.

 

This just makes me laugh….. Eating is totally worth dying for!!